Sunday, December 14, 2008

Macadamia and Apricot Crumble Cake & Is Someone In Your Life Hurting You? Retaliate!

Macadamia & Apricot Crumble Cake

Serves 10-12

1 cup raw macadamia nuts, chopped
1 1/2 cups self raising flour
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon ground ginger
1 teaspoon mixed spice
100g unsalted butter, softened
3/4 cup caster sugar
3 eggs, beaten
1/4 cup buttermilk
8-10 fresh or canned apricot halves

Crumble topping:
1/2 cup raw macadamias
1/3 cup rolled oats
1 tablespoon plain flour
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 tablespoon butter, cut in small pieces

Preheat oven to 180oC. Grease a 23cm round springform cake tin or line with baking paper. Place the chopped macadamia nuts, flour, baking powder and ginger in a food processor and blend until macadamias are ground. In a separate large bowl, beat the butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add the egg gradually, beating well with each addition. Lightly fold through half the macadamia flour mixture followed by the buttermilk. Fold through the remaining flour, then spoon into the prepared tin and smooth the top. Place apricots, skin side down, on the cake gently pressing into mixture. Using fingertips, combine the crumble ingredients and scatter over the apricots. Bake for 50-60 minutes or until a skewer inserted in the centre comes out clean. Allow to cool in the tin for 10 minutes before lifting out onto a wire rack.

Adapted from Source: Australian Macadamia Society

Is Someone In Your Life Hurting You?

The other day I was sharing with a woman who is in the middle of a terrible divorce. Her husband of many years is not happy to just divorce her, but he is trying to ruin her image with her friends, by lying to them and thereby causing them to isolate her. He is trying to ruin her image with their children, by lying to them and saying that she is not a good mother. He has filed for divorce, but that is not enough he is in the process is trying to cut her into a million pieces verbally. Although she won't admit to it, I think he may even be physically abusive with her.

The verbal abusiveness he dishes out is more than enough to make a grown man cry so you can imagine how a gentle, courteous, kind and loving woman feels. When she spoke with me, she was hurting very badly, because he had just told her, "She is too religious for her own good, she is too fat (at 135 pounds), she is ugly (she is a beautiful woman), she is crazy (he says he told her things that he never told her and then because she doesn't remember he says she is crazy), she is a terrible decorator (like he could have done better and if she had the money he spent on other women to decorate with, she could have done better still), she is a poor dresser (but he hardly gives her money with which to buy clothes yet she always looks nice and clean), that she is having an affair (he has had affair, after affair, and everyone except she and the children know it), she needs to get a "real job" (she is a volunteer and does wonderful work) and last but not least he says that she is worthless.

Needless to say when she dropped by to talk with me, she was feeling "lower than the belly of a snake." In counseling with her, I shared with her that many people have been falsely accused and hurt and that false accusations date bake to early Old Testament Bible times. Early on in the Bible, we see in Genesis 3:4 that the devil falsely accused God by saying that God didn't want Adam and Eve to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, because He (God) knew that they would become like God and He (God) didn't want that to happen.

We see in Genesis 39:1 Potiphar's wife's false accusation against Joseph which landed him in jail. King David was falsely accused in 2 Samuel 10:1-5. In Jeremiah 20:10 the prophet Jeremiah says, "For I heard the defaming of many, fear on every side." In 1 Kings 21:1-16 Jezebel made false accusations against Naboth. In Numbers 16:1-3 many people made false accusations against Moses. In Acts 6:1-15 we see that Stephen was falsely accused and we all of course know that Jesus was falsely accused.

To put it in simple terms, when someone is falsely accusing you, they are the one that is wrong! Not you!

What is happing to you has happened to others before you!

My advice to my friend was this!

"Do something which makes you feel good! Help other people. Don't get angry or depressed, get even! Do something GREAT for someone else!"

This is exactly the opposite of what the abuser expects and this is just the opposite of what they want! The abuser wants you to crawl into a hole and feel bad about yourself. Don't do it!

Sweet Revenge!

Giving Always Makes You Feel Better!

Since my early childhood, I saw my parents and grandparents give of their time, food crops, clothing, wisdom and resources. Their giving left an indelible impression on me. I learned to give at a very early age. I raised money for the church youth group selling eggs. We would all gather at the church on Friday night and SELL EGGS. We would "borrow" an egg from one neighbor and sell it to the next neighbor and all of the proceeds would go to the church youth group fund.

When I was maybe 6 or 7 years old, I was on the streets raising money for the new Giraffe enclosure at the Little Rock Zoo. I sold cookies for Girl Scouts. I gave to missionaries at the church and finally when I was old enough, I became a volunteer at the Hospital. I continued and volunteered as a youth member of Lay Witness Missions and eventually went on to be a short term missionary and now am a full time missionary.

Giving came naturally to me. My parents did not have to tell me to give, I learned from watching them and from watching my grandparents. My mom has given away clothing and household items, which she buys at garage sales, since I was little. My grandmothers both feed all of the neighbors and poor anywhere close to them. As a teen, my parents had a young Indian College Exchange Student living in our home.

All this goes to prove the point that you teach your children to give not by "telling" but by "living" the message. I learned well. My daughter Sarah volunteers at the food pantry. My daughter Jessica and her husband volunteer in the children's church ministry at their church and as Bible Study leaders.

The woman I am counseling also comes from a very giving and caring family! While this woman is in the midst of this abusive situation, she has a choice to make! She can do what the abuser wants her to do OR she can do exactly the opposite. She can help others and continue to feel good about herself OR she can have a pity party. Helping others is sweet revenge!

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